Leaving Safely

SAFETY WHEN PREPARING TO LEAVE 

Open a bank account in your own name to begin to establish or increase your independence.
Have a “secret phone” stashed somewhere safe that you can use in emergencies or to contact organisations that can assist. 
Rent a post office box or use a trusted friend or relative’s address to receive mail that may not be safe to receive at home.
Think of other ways in which you can increase your independence. 
Leave money, an extra set of keys, copies of important documents, and extra clothes with a trusted friend or relative so you can leave quickly. 
Determine who would let you stay with them or lend you money. 
Find an organisation or group that can help you and memorise or keep their number for when you need to make an emergency call. 
You can also subscribe to various emergency apps (see our website under resources for ideas) 
Review your safety plan as often as possible.
Remember: Leaving may be the most dangerous time.

SAFETY IN YOUR OWN HOME 

Change your door locks as soon as possible.
Buy additional locks and safety devices to secure your windows. 
Discuss a safety plan with your children for when you are not with them. 
Inform your children’s school or day care about who has permission to pick up your children. 
Inform neighbours and landlord that your partner no longer lives with you and that they should call the police if they see them near your home. 
Always have an escape route, code word and emergency plan in place.

SAFETY WITH A PROTECTION ORDER 

If you have one, keep your protection order on you at all times. 
Call the police if your partner violates the order in any way. 
Think of alternative ways to keep safe if the police do not respond right away. 
Inform family, friends, neighbours, teachers, that you have a restraining order in effect, and give them relevant details (who has custody, when and where visitation takes place, and so on).

SAFETY IN THE WORKPLACE 

If you feel comfortable, tell your boss and co-workers.
Your office may set up a safety policy. 
Give HR or security a copy of your restraining order and a recent picture of the perpetrator. 
Tell your colleagues and office security to call the police if they see your abuser at the workplace.
Ask colleagues not to disclose where you are if your abuser comes to the office or calls. 
Ask someone to screen your calls. 
Move to an alternate worksite, avoid sitting with your back to doors, lobbies or street level windows and include barriers in your workspace such as desks, bookcases, walls, or other furniture. 
Carry a phone, use escorts to vehicles, and park close to the building. 
Keep your office door locked if you can. 
Plan an escape route if your partner comes to work. 
Work when other people are there, never alone. 
Vary your route and the times you go to work.

SAFETY IN THE COMMUNITY 

Vary or change any routine your partner may be familiar with.
Change grocery stores, banks, day care, and so on. 
Go out during the busiest times. 
Have people you trust walk you to and from your car. 
Take someone with you. 
Carry a whistle. 
Take a self-defence class. 
Programme the police, crisis line or friend on your phone. Keep it with you at all times.

WHAT TO TAKE WITH WHEN YOU LEAVE (IF YOU SAFELY CAN) 